WINSTON
was writing in his diary: It was three years ago. It was on a
dark evening, in a narrow side-street near one of the big railway
stations. She was standing near a doorway in the wall, under a
street lamp that hardly gave any light. She had a young face,
painted very thick. It was really the paint that appealed to me,
the whiteness of it, like a mask, and the bright red lips. Party
women never paint their faces. There was nobody else in the
street, and no telescreens. She said two dollars. I For the
moment it was too difficult to go on. He shut his eyes and
pressed his fingers against them, trying to squeeze out the
vision that kept recurring. He had an almost overwhelming
temptation to shout a string of filthy words at the top of his
voice. Or to bang his head against the wall, to kick over the
table, and hurl the inkpot through the window -- to do any
violent or noisy or painful thing that might black out the memory
that was tormenting him. Your worst enemy, he reflected, was your
own nervous system. At any moment the tension inside you was
liable to translate itself into some visible symptom. He thought
of a man whom he had passed in the street a few weeks back; a
quite ordinary-looking man, a Party member, aged thirty-five to
forty, tallish and thin, carrying a brief-case. They were a few
metres apart when the left side of the man's face was suddenly
contorted by a sort of spasm. It happened again just as they were
passing one another: it was only a twitch, a quiver, rapid as the
clicking of a camera shutter, but obviously habitual. He
remembered thinking at the time: That poor devil is done for. And
what was frightening was that the action was quite possibly
unconscious. The most deadly danger of all was talking in your
sleep. There was no way of guarding against that, so far as he
could see. He drew his breath and went on writing: I went with
her through the doorway and across a backyard into a basement
kitchen. There was a bed against the wall, and a lamp on the
table, turned down very low. She His teeth were set on edge.
He would have liked to spit. Simultaneously with the woman in the
basement kitchen he thought of Katharine, his wife. Winston was
married -- had been married, at any rate: probably he still was
married, so far as he knew his wife was not dead. He seemed to
breathe again the warm stuffy odour of the basement kitchen, an
odour compounded of bugs and dirty clothes and villainous cheap
scent, but nevertheless alluring, because no woman of the Party
ever used scent, or could be imagined as doing so. Only the
proles used scent. In his mind the smell of it was inextricably
mixed up with fornication. When he had gone with that woman it
had been his first lapse in two years or thereabouts. Consorting
with prostitutes was forbidden, of course, but it was one of
those rules that you could occasionally nerve yourself to break.
It was dangerous, but it was not a life-and-death matter. To be
caught with a prostitute might mean five years in a forced-labour
camp: not more, if you had committed no other offence. And it was
easy enough, provided that you could avoid being caught in the
act. The poorer quarters swarmed with women who were ready to
sell themselves. Some could even be purchased for a bottle of
gin, which the proles were not supposed to drink. Tacitly the
Party was even inclined to encourage prostitution, as an outlet
for instincts which could not be altogether suppressed. Mere
debauchery did not matter very much, so long as it was furtive
and joyless and only involved the women of a submerged and
despised class. The unforgivable crime was promiscuity between
Party members. But -- though this was one of the crimes that the
accused in the great purges invariably confessed to -- it was
difficult to imagine any such thing actually happening. The aim
of the Party was not merely to prevent men and women from forming
loyalties which it might not be able to control. Its real,
undeclared purpose was to remove all pleasure from the sexual
act. Not love so much as eroticism was the enemy, inside marriage
as well as outside it. All marriages between Party members had to
be approved by a committee appointed for the purpose, and --
though the principle was never clearly stated -- permission was
always refused if the couple concerned gave the impression of
being physically attracted to one another. The only recognized
purpose of marriage was to beget children for the service of the
Party. Sexual intercourse was to be looked on as a slightly
disgusting minor operation, like having an enema. This again was
never put into plain words, but in an indirect way it was rubbed
into every Party member from childhood onwards. There were even
organizations such as the Junior Anti-Sex League, which advocated
complete celibacy for both sexes. All children were to be
begotten by artificial insemination (artsem, it was called
in Newspeak) and brought up in public institutions. This, Winston
was aware, was not meant altogether seriously, but somehow it
fitted in with the general ideology of the Party. The Party was
trying to kill the sex instinct, or, if it could not be killed,
then to distort it and dirty it. He did not know why this was so,
but it seemed natural that it should be so. And as far as the
women were concerned, the Party's efforts were largely
successful. He thought again of Katharine. It must be nine, ten
-- nearly eleven years since they had parted. It was curious how
seldom he thought of her. For days at a time he was capable of
forgetting that he had ever been married. They had only been
together for about fifteen months. The Party did not permit
divorce, but it rather encouraged separation in cases where there
were no children. Katharine was a tall, fair-haired girl, very
straight, with splendid movements. She had a bold, aquiline face,
a face that one might have called noble until one discovered that
there was as nearly as possible nothing behind it. Very early in
her married life he had decided -- though perhaps it was only
that he knew her more intimately than he knew most people -- that
she had without exception the most stupid, vulgar, empty mind
that he had ever encountered. She had not a thought in her head
that was not a slogan, and there was no imbecility, absolutely
none that she was not capable of swallowing if the Party handed
it out to her. 'The human sound-track' he nicknamed her in his
own mind. Yet he could have endured living with her if it had not
been for just one thing -- sex. As soon as he touched her she
seemed to wince and stiffen. To embrace her was like embracing a
jointed wooden image. And what was strange was that even when she
was clasping him against her he had the feeling that she was
simultaneously pushing him away with all her strength. The
rigidlty of her muscles managed to convey that impression. She
would lie there with shut eyes, neither resisting nor
co-operating but submitting. It was extraordinarily
embarrassing, and, after a while, horrible. But even then he
could have borne living with her if it had been agreed that they
should remain celibate. But curiously enough it was Katharine who
refused this. They must, she said, produce a child if they could.
So the performance continued to happen, once a week quite
regulariy, whenever it was not impossible. She even used to
remind him of it in the morning, as something which had to be
done that evening and which must not be forgotten. She had two
names for it. One was 'making a baby', and the other was 'our
duty to the Party' (yes, she had actually used that phrase).
Quite soon he grew to have a feeling of positive dread when the
appointed day came round. But luckily no child appeared, and in
the end she agreed to give up trying, and soon afterwards they
parted. Winston sighed inaudibly. He picked up his pen again and
wrote: She threw herself down on the bed, and at once, without
any kind of preliminary in the most coarse, horrible way you can
imagine, pulled up her skirt. I He saw himself standing there
in the dim lamplight, with the smell of bugs and cheap scent in
his nostrils, and in his heart a feeling of defeat and resentment
which even at that moment was mixed up with the thought of
Katharine's white body, frozen for ever by the hypnotic power of
the Party. Why did it always have to be like this? Why could he
not have a woman of his own instead of these filthy scuffles at
intervals of years? But a real love affair was an almost
unthinkable event. The women of the Party were all alike.
Chastity was as deep ingrained in them as Party loyalty. By
careful early conditioning, by games and cold water, by the
rubbish that was dinned into them at school and in the Spies and
the Youth League, by lectures, parades, songs, slogans, and
martial music, the natural feeling had been driven out of them.
His reason told him that there must be exceptions, but his heart
did not believe it. They were all impregnable, as the Party
intended that they should be. And what he wanted, more even than
to be loved, was to break down that wall of virtue, even if it
were only once in his whole life. The sexual act, successfully
performed, was rebellion. Desire was thoughtcrime. Even to have
awakened Katharine, if he could have achieved it, would have been
like a seduction, although she was his wife. But the rest of the
story had got to be written down. He wrote: I turned up the
lamp. When I saw her in the light After the darkness the
feeble light of the paraffin lamp had seemed very bright. For the
first time he could see the woman properly. He had taken a step
towards her and then halted, full of lust and terror. He was
painfully conscious of the risk he had taken in coming here. It
was perfectly possible that the patrols would catch him on the
way out: for that matter they might be waiting outside the door
at this moment. If he went away without even doing what he had
come here to do. It had got to be written down, it had got to be
confessed. What he had suddenly seen in the lamplight was that
the woman was old. The paint was plastered so thick on her
face that it looked as though it might crack like a cardboard
mask. There were streaks of white in her hair; but the truly
dreadful detail was that her mouth had fallen a little open,
revealing nothing except a cavernous blackness. She had no teeth
at all. He wrote hurriedly, in scrabbling handwriting: When I
saw her in the light she was quite an old woman, fifty years old
at least. But I went ahead and did it just the same. He
pressed his fingers against his eyelids again. He had written it
down at last, but it made no difference. The therapy had not
worked. The urge to shout filthy words at the top of his voice
was as strong as ever.
x x x
- IF THERE
is hope, wrote Winston, it lies in the proles.
- If there was hope, it must lie in the proles,
because only there in those swarming disregarded masses,
85 per cent of the population of Oceania, could the force
to destroy the Party ever be generated. The Party could
not be overthrown from within. Its enemies, if it had any
enemies, had no way of coming together or even of
identifying one another. Even if the legendary
Brotherhood existed, as just possibly it might, it was
inconceivable that its members could ever assemble in
larger numbers than twos and threes. Rebellion meant a
look in the eyes, an inflexion of the voice, at the most,
an occasional whispered word. But the proles, if only
they could somehow become conscious of their own
strength. would have no need to conspire. They needed
only to rise up and shake themselves like a horse shaking
off flies. If they chose they could blow the Party to
pieces tomorrow morning. Surely sooner or later it must
occur to them to do it? And yet-!
- He remembered how once he had been walking down a crowded
street when a tremendous shout of hundreds of voices
women's voices -- had burst from a side-street a little
way ahead. It was a great formidable cry of anger and
despair, a deep, loud 'Oh-o-o-o-oh!' that went humming on
like the reverberation of a bell. His heart had leapt.
It's started! he had thought. A riot! The proles are
breaking loose at last! When he had reached the spot it
was to see a mob of two or three hundred women crowding
round the stalls of a street market, with faces as tragic
as though they had been the doomed passengers on a
sinking ship. But at this moment the general despair
broke down into a multitude of individual quarrels. It
appeared that one of the stalls had been selling tin
saucepans. They were wretched, flimsy things, but
cooking-pots of any kind were always difficult to get.
Now the supply had unexpectedly given out. The successful
women, bumped and jostled by the rest, were trying to
make off with their saucepans while dozens of others
clamoured round the stall, accusing the stallkeeper of
favouritism and of having more saucepans somewhere in
reserve. There was a fresh outburst of yells. Two bloated
women, one of them with her hair coming down, had got
hold of the same saucepan and were trying to tear it out
of one another's hands. For a moment they were both
tugging, and then the handle came off. Winston watched
them disgustedly. And yet, just for a moment, what almost
frightening power had sounded in that cry from only a few
hundred throats ! Why was it that they could never shout
like that about anything that mattered?
- He wrote:
- Until they become conscious they will never rebel, and
until after they have rebelled they cannot become
conscious.
- That, he reflected, might almost have been a
transcription from one of the Party textbooks. The Party
claimed, of course, to have liberated the proles from
bondage. Before the Revolution they had been hideously
oppressed by the capitalists, they had been starved and
flogged, women had been forced to work in the coal mines
(women still did work in the coal mines, as a matter of
fact), children had been sold into the factories at the
age of six. But simultaneously, true to the Principles of
doublethink, the Party taught that the proles were
natural inferiors who must be kept in subjection, like
animals, by the application of a few simple rules. In
reality very little was known about the proles. It was
not necessary to know much. So long as they continued to
work and breed, their other activities were without
importance. Left to themselves, like cattle turned loose
upon the plains of Argentina, they had reverted to a
style of life that appeared to be natural to them, a sort
of ancestral pattern. They were born, they grew up in the
gutters, they went to work at twelve, they passed through
a brief blossoming- period of beauty and sexual desire,
they married at twenty, they were middle-aged at thirty,
they died, for the most part, at sixty. Heavy physical
work, the care of home and children, petty quarrels with
neighbours, films, football, beer, and above all,
gambling, filled up the horizon of their minds. To keep
them in control was not difficult. A few agents of the
Thought Police moved always among them, spreading false
rumours and marking down and eliminating the few
individuals who were judged capable of becoming
dangerous; but no attempt was made to indoctrinate them
with the ideology of the Party. It was not desirable that
the proles should have strong political feelings. All
that was required of them was a primitive patriotism
which could be appealed to whenever it was necessary to
make them accept longer working-hours or shorter rations.
And even when they became discontented, as they sometimes
did, their discontent led nowhere, because being without
general ideas, they could only focus it on petty specific
grievances. The larger evils invariably escaped their
notice. The great majority of proles did not even have
telescreens in their homes. Even the civil police
interfered with them very little. There was a vast amount
of criminality in London, a whole world-within-a-world of
thieves, bandits, prostitutes, drug-peddlers, and
racketeers of every description; but since it all
happened among the proles themselves, it was of no
importance. In all questions of morals they were allowed
to follow their ancestral code. The sexual puritanism of
the Party was not imposed upon them. Promiscuity went
unpunished, divorce was permitted. For that matter, even
religious worship would have been permitted if the proles
had shown any sign of needing or wanting it. They were
beneath suspicion. As the Party slogan put it: 'Proles
and animals are free.'
- Winston reached down and cautiously scratched his
varicose ulcer. It had begun itching again. The thing you
invariably came back to was the impossibility of knowing
what life before the Revolution had really been like. He
took out of the drawer a copy of a children's history
textbook which he had borrowed from Mrs Parsons, and
began copying a passage into the diary:
- In the old days (it ran), before the glorious
Revolution, London was not the beautiful city that we
know today. It was a dark, dirty, miserable place where
hardly anybody had enough to eat and where hundreds and
thousands of poor people had no boots on their feet and
not even a roof to sleep under. Children no older than
you had to work twelve hours a day for cruel masters who
flogged them with whips if they worked too slowly and fed
them on nothing but stale breadcrusts and water.
- But in among all this terrible poverty there were just
a few great big beautiful houses that were lived in by
rich men who had as many as thirty servants to look after
them. These rich men were called capitalists. They were
fat, ugly men with wicked faces, like the one in the
picture on the opposite page. You can see that he is
dressed in a long black coat which was called a frock
coat, and a queer, shiny hat shaped like a stovepipe,
which was called a top hat. This was the uniform of the
capitalists, and no one else was allowed to wear
it. The capitalists owned everything in the world, and
everyone else was their slave. They owned all the land,
all the houses, all the factories, and all the money. If
anyone disobeyed them they could throw them into prison,
or they could take his job away and starve him to death.
When any ordinary person spoke to a capitalist he had to
cringe and bow to him, and take off his cap and address
him as 'Sir'. The chief of all the capitalists was called
the King. and
- But he knew the rest of the catalogue. There would be
mention of the bishops in their lawn sleeves, the judges
in their ermine robes, the pillory, the stocks, the
treadmill, the cat-o'-nine tails, the Lord Mayor's
Banquet, and the practice of kissing the Pope's toe.
There was also something called the jus primae noctis,
which would probably not be mentioned in a textbook for
children. It was the law by which every capitalist had
the right to sleep with any woman working in one of his
factories.
- How could you tell how much of it was lies? It might
be true that the average human being was better off now
than he had been before the Revolution. The only evidence
to the contrary was the mute protest in your own bones,
the instinctive feeling that the conditions you lived in
were intolerable and that at some other time they must
have been different. It struck him that the truly
characteristic thing about modern life was not its
cruelty and insecurity, but simply its bareness, its
dinginess, its listlessness. Life, if you looked about
you, bore no resemblance not only to the lies that
streamed out of the telescreens, but even to the ideals
that the Party was trying to achieve. Great areas of it,
even for a Party member, were neutral and non-political,
a matter of slogging through dreary jobs, fighting for a
place on the Tube, darning a worn-out sock, cadging a
saccharine tablet, saving a cigarette end. The ideal set
up by the Party was something huge, terrible, and
glittering -- a world of steel and concrete, of monstrous
machines and terrifying weapons -- a nation of warriors
and fanatics, marching forward in perfect unity, all
thinking the same thoughts and shouting the same slogans,
perpetually working, fighting, triumphing, persecuting --
three hundred million people all with the same face. The
reality was decaying, dingy cities where underfed people
shuffled to and fro in leaky shoes, in patched-up
nineteenth-century houses that smelt always of cabbage
and bad lavatories. He seemed to see a vision of London,
vast and ruinous, city of a million dustbins, and mixed
up with it was a picture of Mrs Parsons, a woman with
lined face and wispy hair, fiddling helplessly with a
blocked waste-pipe.
- He reached down and scratched his ankle again. Day and
night the telescreens bruised your ears with statistics
proving that people today had more food, more clothes,
better houses, better recreations -- that they lived
longer, worked shorter hours, were bigger, healthier,
stronger, happier, more intelligent, better educated,
than the people of fifty years ago. Not a word of it
could ever be proved or disproved. The Party claimed, for
example, that today 40 per cent of adult proles were
literate: before the Revolution, it was said, the number
had only been 15 per cent. The Party claimed that the
infant mortality rate was now only 160 per thousand,
whereas before the Revolution it had been 300 -- and so
it went on. It was like a single equation with two
unknowns. It might very well be that literally every word
in the history books, even the things that one accepted
without question, was pure fantasy. For all he knew there
might never have been any such law as the jus primae
noctis, or any such creature as a capitalist, or any
such garment as a top hat.
- Everything faded into mist. The past was erased, the
erasure was forgotten, the lie became truth. Just once in
his life he had possessed -- after the event: that
was what counted -- concrete, unmistakable evidence of an
act of falsification. He had held it between his fingers
for as long as thirty seconds. In 1973, it must have been
-- at any rate, it was at about the time when he and
Katharine had parted. But the really relevant date was
seven or eight years earlier.
- The story really began in the middle sixties, the period
of the great purges in which the original leaders of the
Revolution were wiped out once and for all. By 1970 none
of them was left, except Big Brother himself. All the
rest had by that time been exposed as traitors and
counter- revolutionaries. Goldstein had fled and was
hiding no one knew where, and of the others, a few had
simply disappeared, while the majority had been executed
after spectacular public trials at which they made
confession of their crimes. Among the last survivors were
three men named Jones, Aaronson, and Rutherford. It must
have been in 1965 that these three had been arrested. As
often happened, they had vanished for a year or more, so
that one did not know whether they were alive or dead,
and then had suddenly been brought forth to incriminate
themselves in the usual way. They had confessed to
intelligence with the enemy (at that date, too, the enemy
was Eurasia), embezzlement of public funds, the murder of
various trusted Party members, intrigues against the
leadership of Big Brother which had started long before
the Revolution happened, and acts of sabotage causing the
death of hundreds of thousands of people. After
confessing to these things they had been pardoned,
reinstated in the Party, and given posts which were in
fact sinecures but which sounded important. All three had
written long, abject articles in The Times,
analysing the reasons for their defection and promising
to make amends.
- Some time after their release Winston had actually seen
all three of them in the Chestnut Tree Cafe/. He
remembered the sort of terrified fascination with which
he had watched them out of the corner of his eye. They
were men far older than himself, relics of the ancient
world, almost the last great figures left over from the
heroic days of the Party. The glamour of the underground
struggle and the civil war still faintly clung to them.
He had the feeling, though already at that time facts and
dates were growing blurry, that he had known their names
years earlier than he had known that of Big Brother. But
also they were outlaws, enemies, untouchables, doomed
with absolute certainty to extinction within a year or
two. No one who had once fallen into the hands of the
Thought Police ever escaped in the end. They were corpses
waiting to be sent back to the grave.
- There was no one at any of the tables nearest to them. It
was not wise even to be seen in the neighbourhood of such
people. They were sitting in silence before glasses of
the gin flavoured with cloves which was the speciality of
the cafe/. Of the three, it was Rutherford whose
appearance had most impressed Winston. Rutherford had
once been a famous caricaturist, whose brutal cartoons
had helped to inflame popular opinion before and during
the Revolution. Even now, at long intervals, his cartoons
were appearing in The Times. They were simply an
imitation of his earlier manner, and curiously lifeless
and unconvincing. Always they were a rehashing of the
ancient themes -- slum tenements, starving children,
street battles, capitalists in top hats -- even on the
barricades the capitalists still seemed to cling to their
top hats an endless, hopeless effort to get back into the
past. He was a monstrous man, with a mane of greasy grey
hair, his face pouched and seamed, with thick negroid
lips. At one time he must have been immensely strong; now
his great body was sagging, sloping, bulging, falling
away in every direction. He seemed to be breaking up
before one's eyes, like a mountain crumbling.
- It was the lonely hour of fifteen. Winston could not now
remember how he had come to be in the cafe/ at such a
time. The place was almost empty. A tinny music was
trickling from the telescreens. The three men sat in
their corner almost motionless, never speaking.
Uncommanded, the waiter brought fresh glasses of gin.
There was a chessboard on the table beside them, with the
pieces set out but no game started. And then, for perhaps
half a minute in all, something happened to the
telescreens. The tune that they were playing changed, and
the tone of the music changed too. There came into it --
but it was something hard to describe. It was a peculiar,
cracked, braying, jeering note: in his mind Winston
called it a yellow note. And then a voice from the
telescreen was singing:
- Under the spreading chestnut tree
- I sold you and you sold me:
- There lie they, and here lie we
- Under the spreading chestnut tree.
- The three men never stirred. But when Winston glanced
again at Rutherford's ruinous face, he saw that his eyes
were full of tears. And for the first time he noticed,
with a kind of inward shudder, and yet not knowing at
what he shuddered, that both Aaronson and Rutherford
had broken noses.
- A little later all three were re-arrested. It appeared
that they had engaged in fresh conspiracies from the very
moment of their release. At their second trial they
confessed to all their old crimes over again, with a
whole string of new ones. They were executed, and their
fate was recorded in the Party histories, a warning to
posterity. About five years after this, in 1973, Winston
was unrolling a wad of documents which had just flopped
out of the pneumatic tube on to his desk when he came on
a fragment of paper which had evidently been slipped in
among the others and then forgotten. The instant he had
flattened it out he saw its significance. It was a
half-page torn out of The Times of about ten years
earlier -- the top half of the page, so that it included
the date -- and it contained a photograph of the
delegates at some Party function in New York. Prominent
in the middle of the group were Jones, Aaronson, and
Rutherford. There was no mistaking them, in any case
their names were in the caption at the bottom.
- The point was that at both trials all three men had
confessed that on that date they had been on Eurasian
soil. They had flown from a secret airfield in Canada to
a rendezvous somewhere in Siberia, and had conferred with
members of the Eurasian General Staff, to whom they had
betrayed important military secrets. The date had stuck
in Winston's memory because it chanced to be midsummer
day; but the whole story must be on record in countless
other places as well. There was only one possible
conclusion: the confessions were lies.
- Of course, this was not in itself a discovery. Even at
that time Winston had not imagined that the people who
were wiped out in the purges had actually committed the
crimes that they were accused of. But this was concrete
evidence; it was a fragment of the abolished past, like a
fossil bone which turns up in the wrong stratum and
destroys a geological theory. It was enough to blow the
Party to atoms, if in some way it could have been
published to the world and its significance made known.
- He had gone straight on working. As soon as he saw what
the photograph was, and what it meant, he had covered it
up with another sheet of paper. Luckily, when he unrolled
it, it had been upside-down from the point of view of the
telescreen.
- He took his scribbling pad on his knee and pushed back
his chair so as to get as far away from the telescreen as
possible. To keep your face expressionless was not
difficult, and even your breathing could be controlled,
with an effort: but you could not control the beating of
your heart, and the telescreen was quite delicate enough
to pick it up. He let what he judged to be ten minutes go
by, tormented all the while by the fear that some
accident -- a sudden draught blowing across his desk, for
instance -- would betray him. Then, without uncovering it
again, he dropped the photograph into the memory hole,
along with some other waste papers. Within another
minute, perhaps, it would have crumbled into ashes.
- That was ten -- eleven years ago. Today, probably, he
would have kept that photograph. It was curious that the
fact of having held it in his fingers seemed to him to
make a difference even now, when the photograph itself,
as well as the event it recorded, was only memory. Was
the Party's hold upon the past less strong, he wondered,
because a piece of evidence which existed no longer had
once existed?
- But today, supposing that it could be somehow resurrected
from its ashes, the photograph might not even be
evidence. Already, at the time when he made his
discovery, Oceania was no longer at war with Eurasia, and
it must have been to the agents of Eastasia that the
three dead men had betrayed their country. Since then
there had been other changes -- two, three, he could not
remember how many. Very likely the confessions had been
rewritten and rewritten until the original facts and
dates no longer had the smallest significance. The past
not only changed, but changed continuously. What most
afflicted him with the sense of nightmare was that he had
never clearly understood why the huge imposture was
undertaken. The immediate advantages of falsifying the
past were obvious, but the ultimate motive was
mysterious. He took up his pen again and wrote:
- I understand HOW: I
do not understand WHY.
- He wondered, as he had many times wondered before,
whether he himself was a lunatic. Perhaps a lunatic was
simply a minority of one. At one time it had been a sign
of madness to believe that the earth goes round the sun;
today, to believe that the past is inalterable. He might
be alone in holding that belief, and if alone,
then a lunatic. But the thought of being a lunatic did
not greatly trouble him: the horror was that he might
also be wrong.
- He picked up the children's history book and looked at
the portrait of Big Brother which formed its
frontispiece. The hypnotic eyes gazed into his own. It
was as though some huge force were pressing down upon you
-- something that penetrated inside your skull, battering
against your brain, frightening you out of your beliefs,
persuading you, almost, to deny the evidence of your
senses. In the end the Party would announce that two and
two made five, and you would have to believe it. It was
inevitable that they should make that claim sooner or
later: the logic of their position demanded it. Not
merely the validity of experience, but the very existence
of external reality, was tacitly denied by their
philosophy. The heresy of heresies was common sense. And
what was terrifying was not that they would kill you for
thinking otherwise, but that they might be right. For,
after all, how do we know that two and two make four? Or
that the force of gravity works? Or that the past is
unchangeable? If both the past and the external world
exist only in the mind, and if the mind itself is
controllable what then?
- But no! His courage seemed suddenly to stiffen of its own
accord. The face of O'Brien, not called up by any obvious
association, had floated into his mind. He knew, with
more certainty than before, that O'Brien was on his side.
He was writing the diary for O'Brien -- to
O'Brien: it was like an interminable letter which no one
would ever read, but which was addressed to a particular
person and took its colour from that fact.
- The Party told you to reject the evidence of your eyes
and ears. It was their final, most essential command. His
heart sank as he thought of the enormous power arrayed
against him, the ease with which any Party intellectual
would overthrow him in debate, the subtle arguments which
he would not be able to understand, much less answer. And
yet he was in the right! They were wrong and he was
right. The obvious, the silly, and the true had got to be
defended. Truisms are true, hold on to that! The solid
world exists, its laws do not change. Stones are hard,
water is wet, objects unsupported fall towards the
earth's centre. With the feeling that he was speaking to
O'Brien, and also that he was setting forth an important
axiom, he wrote:
- Freedom is the freedom to say that two plus two make
four. If that is granted, all else follows.